BusinessWorld, September 8-9, 2006, Weekender Section
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Focus
By ANNA BARBARA L. LORENZO, Reporter
Good vibrations: toys for grown-ups
When he was in college, Jamie Dy found a penis enlargement manual on the Internet and gave copies of it to his friends in exchange for prepaid phone cards. He made P3,000 to P5,000 worth of cards every week.
His entrepreneurial skills stood out even as he was taking up a course in consular diplomatic affairs. Seeing the business potential in sex enhancers, he bought enlarger pumps and sold them to his existing clientele for as much as thrice the price. He also started selling vibrators at three times his acquisition cost.
When Mr. Dy had 10 items on his list of products, he decided to put up a small showroom in his garage. Today, a more professional looking showroom lies across his office on the second floor of a building in Malate. From mere whispers among friends, clients can now order discreetly through the Internet from what Mr. Dy calls The LoveStore.
Behind a gray door that one can easily mistake for that of a maintenance room is a short hallway outlined at the end with a chain of red lights — as if marking the spot where the party begins.
A couple of steps up the stairs and you are surrounded by shelves of plastic-wrapped penises that can stay still, vibrate, grind, or both, made of silicon, latex, rubber, and the latest trend, cyberskin; rows of what look like tumblers decorated with kinky Japanese cartoons which are, in fact, pocket vaginas; and a spread of condom varieties which come in different flavors and makes that can increase stimulation, delay orgasm, and even vibrate.
In one corner of the room, an inflated sex doll in a red costume stands against the wall, cuffed and strapped, with a gag-ball inside its open mouth. On the floor on one side is a "tree butt," a lifesize bust of male genitalia. Right beside it is "Booba," a huge pair of vibrator-ready breasts. They sell for P5,000 each. Both are made of cyberskin which is a material that feels like human skin. Cyberskin is a latex-free substance — Mr. Dy pointed out that latex use in sex toys is being phased out because some people are allergic to it.
"The best seller for guys are the pocket vaginas. Even women buy it for their husbands, especially those who are going to work abroad," Mr. Dy said in an interview.
Pocket vaginas cost between P800 and P1,000 and The LoveStore sells as many as 200 units every month. Vibrators of various kinds and functions are tagged at P800 and above, and about 70 to 100 are sold in a month.
While The LoveStore already has a wide array of products, Mr. Dy still offers what had gotten him into the sexual aid business in the first place — he is licensed to sell Asian RX, a penis enlargement program that comes in two bottles good for one month. He sells it in a package along with an exercise manual and a vibrating condom.
"Every month I always think of a promo. There are products which I put on sale for up to 70% off," Mr. Dy said.
Clients usually place their orders online (www.adults.com.ph) while the showroom is open to anyone who wants to check out the goods. The LoveStore also has a new showroom in Quezon Ave., Quezon City.
FIND A SEX TOY STORE NEAR YOU
Another popular stop for novelty toys used for intercourse is Pride Exchange in Malate. Unlike The LoveStore where transactions are done online, one has to go and visit Pride Exchange to pick up the goods.
Pride Exchange is celebrating its 5th anniversary tomorrow. The store was founded in 1999 by Jomar Fleras, who likewise established Reach Out Foundation, which promotes AIDS awareness in the Philippines. From encouraging people to use protection, the place has expanded to offering toys that can enhance sexual pleasure.
"The sex shop basically helps enhance the union of couples. Instead of the husband playing around, the man and his wife can just play together," said Pride Exchange Manager Henry Chua.
Meanwhile, amid the gun shops and pirated DVD stores at the Makati Cinema Square lies the Manila Swedish store, its windows partially opaqued to hide the goods inside. Posters of sexy women adorn the walls, while the glass shelves encase dildos, vibrators and sex dolls. The Pleasure Place at Metrowalk in Ortigas is another venue for those seeking novelty items they can use on themselves or with someone.
And of course, perhaps the pioneer in selling sex toys in the country, Gary Lising’s Joke Time in Robinson’s Galleria also has its own line of vibrators and pleasure rings, among other naughty novelty items.
At the second floor of the Ali Mall atrium is a store that specializes in women’s needs. Bare Essentials was initially created to provide women in their 30s and 40s with items like lubricants and moisturizers, but now the store caters to women of all ages.
"I was in my 40s then and I’d go around and meet friends and talk would always turn to those issues. Anywhere I’d go, I couldn’t find anything that sold or addressed women’s health," said Bare Essentials owner Marie Ann Topacio, who ran a gun store before getting into women’s intimate items. "I bought a lot of products so that the Filipino woman would know that there is such a thing as a moisturizer or a lubricant."
Ms. Topacio said these products are necessary for women in their mid-life because some of those who are approaching menopause or going through menopause and beyond tend to be dry.
"Sometimes they get so dry that they end up bleeding and having infections. I want to teach women that there is an alternative for them. It’s not taboo, it’s about your health," Ms. Topacio said.
Lubricants at Bare Essentials are sold in small packets costing from P30 to P90 a piece or in bigger packages that can cost up to P1,000. The store has expanded its offerings since it opened three years ago to include other items ranging from the usual dildos to special vibrators that cost over P10,000, stimulating oils, powders and creams.
The store also has a sexual aid kit that is designed based on scientific and clinical studies.
"People think these sexual aids are taboo or X-rated or dirty. They’re not. A lot of the sexual therapists in the United States found that there is a connection between the quality of life and those aids," Ms. Topacio said.
HELP, ANYONE?
Mr. Dy said the increased visibility of sex toy stores could be attributed to the growing awareness of the public about the merchandise.
"In the first place, they see it on television and in movies like American Pie. A lot of people are also looking for a place that is also discreet," he added.
Mr. Chua, on the other hand, said the shops are really just there to help those who need items which could enhance their sexual experience.
Aside from sex toys and aids, most of the stores also offer other products such as lingerie, casual apparel, and even books and video CDs and DVDs.
The people behind these stores all agree that the toys are there to help anyone enjoy the sexual experience, whether alone or with a partner.
"Sa mag-asawa, dumadating ang time na nanglalamig kayo sa isa’t isa. Nakakatulong ang visual representation of sex. (There comes a time when married couples cool off. The visual representation of sex then helps.) If you come here, you’ll see na marami pang possibilities na pwedeng gawin (you will see that there are still many things that can be done)," Pride Exchange’s Mr. Chua said.
Author and clinical psychologist Dr. Margarita Holmes said that sex toys can, indeed, help couples in bed as long as no one or nothing is abused.
"They can be a lot of fun and they can make sex more exciting. And if only because of that they can help a relationship," Dr. Holmes said.
"But if one person does not want to use the sex toy and the other one does, therefore it is oppressive, then that’s not very good. It is not validating to the person. That’s where it can be damaging."
She added that in the end, and open line of communication between the couple is always a better way of improving the relationship of a man and a woman.
Aside from getting something just for the fun of it, Mr. Dy said one also has to be aware of the quality of the toys he or she is getting. After all, some low quality products can come off during intercourse, which can then cause health problems.
Obstetrician and gynecologist Dr. Lea Piramide said she recently had to remove a rubber ring left inside the vagina of a patient.
"Once there is a foreign object inside, magkakaroon talaga ng infection at discharge (there will be an infection and discharge)," Dr. Piramide said.
Dr. Holmes said that the fact that sex toys are now seen more often in public places does not necessarily mean that society is more open to the subject of sex as some people still consider talking about it taboo.
"We are still rather traditional in this country. Sex does not exist in a vacuum. The politics of a place, the economy, the disparity of the rich and the poor have a much stronger impact than what the moralists are trying to say on whether the sex toys are being sold in Quiapo [are immoral] or not," she added.
A VIEW FROM THE CATHOLIC CHURCH
With the Philippines being primarily Catholic, Archbishop Oscar Cruz said the more open operations of sex stores reflect the public morals of today’s society.
"It is not a secret that social ethics are being less and less observed. The moral code is becoming more and more lax as we go onwards, which is sad," Archbishop Cruz said.
He added that the use of toys representing human genitalia "demonstrate hedonism either in a solitary, lateral or multilateral form.
"These gadgets are not helping, rather they are disturbing the natural function of sexuality, bringing it to a level of machine-generated carnal joy," the archbishop said.
Lubricants, however, are acceptable as they help a woman carry out her natural function within the confines of marriage, he noted.
SEX TOYS AND THE OFW
Over eight million Filipinos work abroad to feed their families left behind in the Philippines. Hence, sex toys are popular among couples forced apart by their economic conditions.
"Sexual aids are better, cleaner, safer, with no emotional complication. It’s better than to be unfaithful to the husband who is breaking his back working in Saudi," Bare Essential’s Ms. Topacio said.
In another case, Dr. Holmes, who is also a columnist for a local tabloid, said she received a letter from an OFW who wanted to remain faithful to his wife and asked if he could use a sex doll.
She gave her nod.
Archbishop Cruz, however, disagrees.
"That is a false assumption. More than stopping one from searching for another partner, it will just provoke him. The moment one uses these things, the more predisposed he is to seek the real thing," he said.
There will always be an endless debate on whether sex toys are beneficial or detrimental.
In the meantime, you can check out the store nearest you and decide.
I’ll have to write off my plans of getting a one-g flash drive (to those who are getting books, you owe me big time :P).
